レイチェル・ブレイセンのインスタグラム(yoga_girl) - 8月4日 03時18分

Came home after morning class to plant flowers around Peppers grave (jasmine. Also planting peppers), and as we finished up I noticed blood tracks inside the house. Turns out Laika, one of our other dogs, was having a nose bleed and as I examine her to figure out where she was bleeding from Quila got too close and they started fighting. Of course. If they are going to rip each other apart, it's this week. We rush to the vet and it turns out Laika has the same disease that killed Pepper. It's a certain type of very severe tick fever that can be cured if it's caught early but only then. Pepper showed no symptoms until it was too late, and we saw four vets in Sweden this summer (for flight purposes and because he had an ear infection) but not one single one of them noticed anything unusual. He was running and playing and swimming and being his usual self until all of a sudden he wasn't anymore and then it was too late to save him. They might all have the same disease. We have to check Quila and Ringo tomorrow. They are all fine as of now and the only one showing symptoms is Laika but we've caught it early. This all fucking sucks. We take all precautions and give them frontline and certifect consistently but obviously it's not enough. I keep thinking we should have done so many things differently. Could have would have should have. It's too late now.

When we came home this massive ask moth was sitting under our mailbox. First I thought it meant death but the markings on the wings look exactly like Peppers eyes. I think he was paying us a visit. Just checking in, you know? I like to think so. I fell asleep on the couch with Ringo yesterday and I woke up feeling like Pepper was curled around my neck. I could feel his presence and almost almost hear his breath in my ear. No more death, please. Please. Thank you.

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