ハンナ・シューベルトさんのインスタグラム写真 - (ハンナ・シューベルトInstagram)「There have been a few things that I wanted to share for a while so here is PART 1 of things I want to get off my chest First I wanted to talk about how the situation looked like before I started my summer trip to America. My aunt got diagnosed with cancer (again) at the beginning of the year, she had surgery, the cancer came back, she started chemotherapy and her condition got worse and worse. Being close to her through all of this it brought back a lot of old memories and experiences from back when my mum was struggling with the same disease and got defeated by it in the end. When my aunt died too in july I felt like I emotionally shut down completely, couldn’t cry, grief or feel anything. I guess dealing with the death of my aunt (who was like a second mum for me) in combination with all of the pain from the past coming back up was just too much. I knew that if my body, heart and mind decides to lock those emotions away it’s for a good reason and means I’m not able to handle all of this right now so I accepted it. But it felt really shit. I didn’t feel like myself at all. At the funeral I was just standing there feeling empty and cold knowing in my head that everything people said were sad and touching words that would usually cause some emotional reactions from me and probably those emotions were there somewhere inside of me but I had no access to them so I didn’t feel anything. And it sucked. At the end of july I competed at the European university championships which was a chance to escape from everything that was going on at home and the weeks before. During this comp and short trip to poland I could finally find my way back to feeling like myself. Even though my emotions were still a bit numb I could feel their existence and just being out there climbing, meeting new people and having fun brought me so much joy :) What I want to say is that sometimes you need some distance & distraction. Obviously it’s not good to run away from problems but a short break from them can be necessary so when you come back everything seems (at least a bit) more manageable 🙏 Thanks to the people around me during the time I didn’t feel like myself - I love you🫶🏻」10月13日 2時27分