チェルシー・ルーズさんのインスタグラム写真 - (チェルシー・ルーズInstagram)「Sometimes there’s not a right way to start. So here, I’ll just dive in. As @savvytothemax would say, “vulnerable post ahead.” I hadn’t really lost anyone close to me until two years ago. Savannah messaged me one evening and said “Hayden and Inge passed away...did you know?!” I remember I was standing in my kitchen when I got the message. My heart stopped, I was confused. While Hayden and I weren’t super close, I really looked up to him. He romped around in Eldo with me; sharing the history of the area with me, laughing, and urging me to take lead when I knew I was much too scared to do so. I was happy following him, talking with him, and thriving from our energy up high with the wind and the birds. Moments I’ll never forget. 5 months later I was at my grandmothers house in bed. I got a text from a friend stating, “Savannah was in an accident today and passed away. I know you two were close and I thought you should know.” Shortly thereafter we got on the phone. The all too familiar feeling of heart ache, shock, total confusion and disbelief ran over me. I didn’t sleep that night. And I snuck out of the house early in the morning, driving east during sunrise, re-listening to @powercompanyclimbing podcast featuring @savvytothemax with tears streaming down my face. She was like a little sister to me. In April of this year, another friends life was taken - Jess. Regardless of where we were in the country, he always reached out to say hi and check in. We talked about me heading to Washington to spend time with him and his wife, and questing to Canada to reintroduce me to ice climbing and the beauty of the mountains. Our conversations about life, struggle, and love touched my heart in times where it was much needed. About 3 years ago, a piece of me went missing. It was exchanged with anxiety, loss of humor, a feeling of shame, doubt and a feeling of wanting to pick up and move on. Having these feelings, followed by loss of those who touched my heart in ways others weren’t, amplified those feelings even more. Lots of grief and trauma. This weekend at Devils Lake I attended the grief workshop held by @americanalpine and Madeline Sorkin. (Finished in comments)」10月17日 0時22分