アマンダ・サイフリッドのインスタグラム(mingey) - 7月12日 05時23分
To all who feel bullied or thin-shamed during our recent social media discussion:
If you know me or are familiar with any of my beliefs or stances you’ll recognize that it isn’t in my character to tear down anyone for “being who they are”. Each of us has the ability and the freedom to say and do as we choose. However, as I’m acutely aware, there’s a price tag for the group of people who find themselves with a platform to stand on. You have to be aware of the message you’re sending and be able to back it up when faced with criticism (not just praise). Hold yourselves accountable instead of using the terms above.
The only thing I’d take back is exactly how I started this debate. I desperately wish it hadn’t targeted (or blasted) one person (there are MANY who engage in this questionable messaging) and instead started a cleaner, general conversation. No one needs to tear anyone apart. And I regret that it’s present right now. To the lady in question: I’m sorry for the truly negative feels you’ve endured because of this.
Aside from the messy detour? The bigger, important message seems to filtering through and helping a lot of women feel supported. And that’s the name of the game.
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elliecita
Hi @mingey ! I think so much of your point has merit, yet I too am hesitant at the means of getting there. I think your friend @sophieflack and you would both agree with me that a woman speaking positively of her body, feeling proud and strong in her skin, is itself an act of resistance in a society & culture that constantly tells us that we’re not enough? That posting to over 1 million people that you are proud of your body after bringing life into the world is a slap in the face to the patriarchy? I’ll agree with you that the aesthetic presented is unattainable and potentially unhealthy for most of us, yet what good comes from bashing another woman’s celebration of herself? None, in my personal opinion. The anger feels misplaced form the real issue, which is unequal access to postpartum support and privilege. The conversation around access and privilege is a nuanced & important one, yet I do believe there’s room for us all to celebrate feeling good about ourselves as women and mothers regardless of the VASTLY different access we have to privilege and priorities. Unfortunately to me the long essay and the repost felt hurtful & unkind, and lent itself to clickbait/repost drama which dilutes the actual important conversation at hand. I really appreciate your willingness to see some fault in how your words may have landed, I think we need so much more of that in the world. Thanks for all your support of women and your love of dogs!
kathrynepearce
I tend to not agree with posting bikini pic of yourself in the mirror in general, yet this is more and more becoming a common practice on Instagram. I just don’t get it and it does make me think these women are objectifying themselves to the world. I do get being body positive is important and that sometimes that comes with showing off your figure to the world. To me, the bikini body pic on social is a pretty extreme way to do this and so understand the impulse to call her out. We’re standing on a thin line here between body-positive and body-objectification. I really don’t want us to start down some different rabbit hole where model perfect bodies on Instgram become the new glossy pages of Cosmo setting a different expectation for us - that not only do we need to be body-positive we need to post pictures of ourselves to Instagram to prove it. If we are creating the new pages of Cosmo and collectively posting the content - should we try not to make the same mistakes? As women, it’s so easy for us to use our bodies as the imagery of our posts (it gets lots of followers fast), but what are we saying by doing this? We have the opportunity to refocus from our bodies to telling a fuller story. I just don’t want us to get caught up in the same self-destructive traps that once were imposed on us by the patriarchy. I think at the heart of this debate is the sentiment that we can do better.
elliecita
@elliecita How cool would have it been if instead of a public shaming and take down, you and your friend had posted pictures of yourselves as powerful moms saying you’re too proud of your post-baby bodies and tagged Arielle? Then women all over the country could post their own, as they have, and it could be a true showing of what all powerful and proud moms look like? The mindset that one must be taken down so that others can be uplifted is so backwards and harmful - what a missed opportunity! All of the comments have been so divisive, with some of your followers making accusations aloud (that someone doesn’t spend enough time with their children or isn’t a good parent) about someone they know nothing about! Misguided approach - I know we can do so so much better! Please keep this conversation going in a way that acknowledges the best we have to offer each other, and that sarcastic comments shaming a stranger for having a nanny are NOT a way to lead to constructive conversation on this platform!
hbvl45
@ser617 why don’t you take a look at the 4000 nasty comments left on Arielle’s post after Amanda shared her post. Don’t be so naive.. she has 4mil followers who immediately were able to find Arielle’s post. I’m enraged that Amanda had the audacity to call her irresponsible... while being irresponsible herself. Shaming a woman who openly discusses her weight struggles with her followers and has shared transparently her journey to body-acceptance and positivity. And then people like you calling Amanda graceful for failing to properly research a person before criticizing their approach to themselves and their social media. There’s nothing graceful about shaming another person for being proud of their body and posting it on their OWN page. I’m truly worried by adult women who think these type of social media call-outs are okay. My mother raised me to allow people to be who they are and support them... if you have children, I hope you did the same.
ambi_d83
@taylabray I understand privilege love. I don’t understand how people can judge how difficult others lives have been or not based on how they look. All people. It’s judgement and ignorant, plain and simple. We all go through different trials and tribulations. And it’s all valid and to be respected. It would be like me telling those that have been bullied for how they physically look don’t that their trauma is not as valid as mine for being physically and sexually abused throughout my childhood and youth, and adult life. Trauma is trauma and it’s all valid. It comes in different ways no matter our place, looks and beliefs in this world. And usually those who experience it are much more compassionate to all people because they understand. While some things may have come easier to me because of my thinness (?). It certainly was not anything that actually mattered in this world. ✌?✨
tapedfingers
As a woman built very similar to the woman you attacked (yes, attacked, because she was just minding her own business) I find your apology to be shallow. You wouldn't be apologizing if people didn't come to correct you. There are millions of skinny women that look just like her. There are millions of women that don't. And that's okay. She has a right to be proud of the body she's in -- she can post her body if she wants to. The argument that, "she's an influencer" is invalid. At the end of the day, people should just accept their own bodies, regardless of what influencers look like. We need to stop blaming others for our own insecurities, take a deep look at ourselves, and learn to just ACCEPT. How about we play a game while we're at it? It's called, "Stop Commenting On Other Women's Bodies." Period.
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