ルイーズ・ペントランドのインスタグラム(louisepentland) - 5月1日 17時08分

Remember all those videos I made in 2011 about how to handle the baby months, how much I was loving new motherhood and how fantastic I found newborn life? Nope, nor do I because I didn't make them. It's UK MATERNAL MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS WEEK and the theme is 'support for all'. I didn't make those videos because I didn't find it fantastic or wonderful. I thought my baby Darcy was perfect, I loved her, I'd have run through a burning building for her but my God I struggled. I was lonely AF, felt like a fat frumpy shell of my former self, mentally unstimulated, frustrated that I wasn't experiencing the 'best job in the world' or feeling 'completely in love' with her and frankly, a bit bored. Every time I thought of the birth I cried and felt dirty. I mentioned it briefly to my dr and he suggested 'the baby blues'. It took for me to be triggered by Pearl's pregnancy to be diagnosed with PTSD. Also, the thing about bored and frustrated, that's true- Motherhood is those things sometimes! It's ok to say it too! You don't always have to preface with 'I love my baby but' or end with 'but it's worth it'. If you feel cruddy, PLEASE keep telling your midwife/dr, even if it's years after. Good news is, you can get better, it all gets a LOT better. And when it is all better, you do find yourself making all those videos and telling people, 'motherhood, it's the best job in the world!' ❤️????❤️

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