ジ・オニオンのインスタグラム(theonion) - 5月13日 01時17分

Carefully inspecting the rows in hopes of deciphering the right configuration among thousands, local woman Mary Molatino was reportedly rearranging the condiments in her refrigerator door Friday like she was working on a puzzle in an ancient tomb. The 26-year-old, as if sorting glyphs to reveal the mysterious pattern that would unlock a pharaoh’s burial chamber, began by twisting a bottle of salad dressing edgewise and sliding it against the light mayonnaise, a maneuver that left room for the newly purchased jar of cornichons and, if her hunch was correct, the Sriracha sauce. According to sources, Molatino then paused to consider the difficult task that still lay before her, in the manner of a seasoned archaeologist keenly aware that the crypt of a king would not easily yield to the desecration of a trespasser. #TheOnion

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